By: Alexandra Perez

Kitt Cowles specializes in something many coaches don’t address: helping accomplished women over 40 shift from feeling unsupported to discovering ways to receive the support they need more naturally.

When Perfection Starts to Feel Like a Burden

In her early forties, Kitt had achieved many of the societal milestones that were often considered markers of success. She had transitioned from a successful career to being a stay-at-home mom, had a loving marriage, beautiful children, and a dream house. However, she also found herself feeling emotionally drained from trying to be everything to everyone except herself. “I was at my breaking point, seen only for what I could do for others,” she recalls. “I kept wondering when it would be my turn.”

That breaking point eventually led to a breakthrough when Kitt realized that many other accomplished women were experiencing similar struggles—not necessarily due to overwork, but because they were living in a way that didn’t align with their core values while seeking support that they felt should come naturally.

The Real Roots of the Midlife Crisis

What Kitt discovered through her personal journey is that the challenges often associated with midlife are not necessarily about aging but rather about a misalignment with one’s core values. “When you spend years making decisions based on what you think you should want instead of what truly matters to you, your body and mind start signaling distress,” she explains.

Her approach is not about quick fixes, but about realignment. Kitt helps women uncover their underlying core values and gradually restructure their lives to reflect those values, rather than external expectations. The outcome? Women who stop feeling like they are constantly struggling to gain support because they have learned to connect with people and environments that naturally offer it.

Beyond Boundaries: Ethical Selfishness™

Kitt’s signature framework, Ethical Selfishness™, encourages women to rethink what it means to prioritize their own well-being, but it’s not about selfishness in a negative sense. “It’s about recognizing that when you consistently honor your values and protect your energy, those around you benefit too,” she explains.

Her clients don’t just set boundaries—they create sustainable systems that serve their well-being over the long term. Women have made significant changes, including stepping away from relationships that no longer aligned with their values and leaving jobs that felt draining. Others have repaired estranged relationships, found a clearer sense of purpose, and one client even became an internationally recognized author. More importantly, they now feel that the support they need is becoming more accessible and less of a struggle.

“The ripple effect is real,” Kitt notes. “When a woman stops minimizing herself to make others comfortable, it gives everyone around her—her partner, children, friends, coworkers—permission to show up more authentically as well.”

Why Experience Can Be More Valuable Than Credentials

Kitt didn’t enter this field with traditional coaching credentials or a formal psychology background. What she brought with her was something often more impactful: the lived experience of rebuilding her own life from the inside out.

“Imposter syndrome hit hard initially,” she admits. “But then I realized—would you prefer to learn from someone who read stacks of books about swimming but has never actually swum, or from someone who’s been in the pool long enough to have pruny fingers? For me, the answer was clear.”

This insight became her foundation. She stopped asking for permission and began standing confidently in her own story, combining her lived experiences with strategic approaches to help women navigate the shift from burnout to empowerment through authentic alignment. “My clients are accomplished women who’ve already proven they can achieve a lot,” she says. “They need strategic support from someone who understands the unique challenges of transformation at this stage of life.”

A Sense of Urgency

Kitt is clear that her approach is results-oriented. “My clients are 40 and older,” she says. “There’s no time for unnecessary delays. They’re ready to cut through the noise and focus on what really works for them.”

This practical approach shapes her plans for the future: two books in development and intensive in-person retreats and VIP experiences designed for rapid transformation. Although virtual sessions offer value, she believes that nothing compares to the energy of women gathering in the same space and working together in person.

Her Message: Take Action Now

For women who are on the brink of change, Kitt’s message is straightforward: “Stop waiting for permission from anyone other than yourself. If you’re asking when it will be your turn, the answer is NOW!” Her own journey taught her that qualification doesn’t come from having the perfect resume—it comes from having the courage to act boldly and commit to the path ahead.

Her advice centers on three core principles: Follow your passions (not just your skills, but what you find impossible to ignore). Understand your values (they act as your compass when things feel chaotic). Embrace your unique perspective (if something excites you, trust that others might also benefit from hearing it from you).

Her Legacy? Loud, Proud, and Unapologetic

Kitt doesn’t just talk about transformation—she lives it. Her work is for women who are ready to stop shrinking themselves to fit into spaces that no longer align with their potential. She’s walked through the struggles of living misaligned and has emerged with a roadmap that others can follow.

Today, she demonstrates that your challenging experiences can become the powerful elements of your message, and that sometimes the qualified person to lead transformation is the one who has dared to go first.

The women Kitt works with aren’t just building confidence—they are reclaiming their lives. And if Kitt Cowles has her way, the next generation of midlife women will not be waiting for permission to take up space. They will step into rooms knowing they belong, creating the supportive systems they deserve, and ultimately reshaping the landscape for women everywhere.

Disclaimer: The content of this article is for informational purposes only. The strategies and experiences shared by Kitt Cowles are based on her personal journey and the women she has worked with. Individual results may vary, and the information provided is not intended to guarantee similar outcomes for all readers. The advice offered in this article should not be considered a substitute for professional guidance or therapy. Always seek professional advice if needed for personal or health-related matters.