With an overwhelming portion of human connection occurring through computers and mobile devices, the way we communicate is greatly affected by both the limitations technology imposes and the endless access it provides.
Practicing mindful communication is a great way to improve your personal and professional relationships in the era of remote work, Zoom meetings, and social media interaction. Below, we’ll explore what mindful communication truly is, and how you can enhance your communication skills to foster more meaningful relationships with the people in your life.
What Is Mindful Digital Communication?
Mindful digital communication is all about staying present and open when engaging with others through phones, computers, and other forms of technology. It’s about being aware when listening and speaking, using all of your senses to become in tune with the other person for the most clear and effective communication possible.
Active listening is a major tenet of mindful communication. When you actively listen, you use body signals like eye contact and smiles. Offer verbal affirmations and use your full concentrative capacity to increase empathy. When it feels appropriate, such as when the other person is expressing particularly important points, respond by paraphrasing their words back to them, with an emphasis on the feeling those words convey.
Look directly at someone when digitally communicating, offer eye contact, and resist looking around the room or peering at other tabs/applications. Mindful communication also includes expressing yourself honestly and respectfully. It can be tempting to interrupt when you disagree, especially over the phone, where physical cues that signal gaps in the conversation aren’t available. Be sure to wait for the other person to fully finish their thoughts before sharing yours. Digitally, it can be difficult to engage this way, but it isn’t impossible.
Using Mindful Communication for Enhancing Communication Skills
As a whole, mindful communication practices allow us to form better bonds with our peers. You can use these practices to improve your communication skills in the digital world, conveying your feelings in a manner that is easy to receive and understand, all while providing others with the empathy and understanding you’re looking to receive yourself. Though mindful digital communication has its challenges, there are ways to overcome them.
Digital Communication Challenges
Here are a few of the most prevalent challenges that accompany digital communication.
Body Language Limitations
Many times, when communicating digitally, you are not able to see the other person in real time. This can contribute to feelings of disconnection, or it can be hard to understand how someone is feeling if you are just texting them or speaking over the phone. It becomes increasingly more difficult when communication isn’t live (i.e. through social media comments, e-mail, etc.) and you are waiting for a response, which can cause feelings of anxiety or make you second-guess your own message
These limitations leave a lot of room for misunderstandings, and even more time for these misunderstandings to fester and grow into ideas that aren’t easily forgotten, even after the communication error is repaired.
Typos and Text Finality
Typos and grammar errors can truly make or break a message, especially when it comes to professional correspondence. Digital communication has a certain level of permanence – once you make a mistake and hit send, many platforms do not allow you to edit your responses. Or, if they do, the other person is usually allowed to see what the original message said. This can leave a bad taste in the other person’s mouth: typos may indirectly indicate a carelessly written email, a thoughtless response, or a lack of understanding of a particular subject. Even worse, this mistake can be viewed over and over again.
Emotional Distance
Often, when people communicate digitally, they are able to say things that they wouldn’t normally say in person. Digital communication can also feel devoid of emotion altogether. Messages with perfect grammar and punctuation can come off as cold and detached depending on the relationship you have with the other person.
Video meetings leave a lot of opportunities for detachment: cameras can be switched off and mics can be turned off, leaving people who are audio-visually present feeling awkward or uncomfortable when communicating with a virtually blank screen. This distance can create unnecessary conflict and a feeling of unspoken loneliness, fraying relationships.
Infinite Distractions
Computer and mobile devices yield access to an incredible amount of information and entertainment sources, many of which you can juggle at the same time. These distractions are tempting, and they often take people out of the moment, leading to abrupt ends in conversations and feelings of abandonment or disrespect.
The Digital Divide
A digital divide describes the disconnect that occurs between folks who have reliable access to the internet and all that accompanies it and those who are not able to access the internet in a similar manner.
Many older people who didn’t grow up around computers struggle with internet communication. This is also true for those who experienced income barriers to computer ownership and internet access, either as a child or as an adult. Since so much of the world is encased behind a screen, it can be hard for these folks to communicate effectively to maintain relationships, work, or receive healthcare.
Digital Communication Tips
Even with the seemingly expansive array of digital communication challenges, there are ways to overcome them using mindful communication practices.
Limit Distractions
When communicating digitally, try not to multitask on your device. For example, if you are speaking on the phone to someone, avoid scrolling Instagram or texting someone else simultaneously. Give the person your undivided attention.
Be Empathetic
This is one of the most essential parts of mindful digital communication. Improving your emotional intelligence (which means regulating your emotional processing and responses) lends you the opportunity to use mindful communication techniques more frequently and naturally in your daily interactions. A big part of sharpening your emotional intelligence is learning how to explore empathy and implementing empathic responses into communication.
Empathetic communication requires you to put yourself in someone else’s shoes for a minute. Think about how you would react if you held a meeting with a sea of voiceless, faceless attendees via Zoom. How would this make you feel? Based on your answer, you should act accordingly. Empathy also requires active listening – ask questions and verbally engage in digital conversations to let the other person know you’re interested in what they have to say.
Take a Tech Break
To put your best foot forward during conversations, it is important to practice digital detox. Don’t aimlessly scroll and comment on social posts as if there are no real people on the opposite side of the screen. Find time to be present in the physical world – this will allow you to think twice before engaging in meaningless or potentially hurtful conversations.
Upgrading Communication Practices in the Digital Workplace
Relationships and productivity in the workplace thrive when communication is at its peak. Internally, you can improve communication by employing digital work management and messaging channels, such as Slack, Trello, and Asana. Though these platforms make it easier to compartmentalize tasks and transfer information, they don’t rectify the issue of increasing awareness, being present, and speaking intentionally when corresponding with colleagues and clients.
At work, identifying your intentions when communicating is important. Think about what you’re trying to accomplish when communicating digitally. Are you trying to get support for a project? Are you requesting time off? Are you selling a client on a new service you have? From here, you can use mindfulness techniques to achieve your communication goals.
For example, when corresponding with colleagues via video meeting, close all unnecessary tabs on your computer and leave your camera on at all times. Even if you don’t agree with their statement, wait until they finish speaking and open yourself up to a collaborative, rather than combative, experience. Using these techniques opens you up to more productive and meaningful relationships both in the workplace and outside of it.
Published by Joshua F.
